But how do normal people just keep talking in a conversation that has no gaps? I’ve seen it happen, the conversation stays on a topic but there are literally no gaps where you can start talking. It’s like they know when it’s their turn so they can immediately start talking when the other person finished their sentence. And they know what the other persons last word is.
They don’t really always do that. I think there is also a thing where the one talking let the other one take the word if they start talking.
As an adhd gal i often experience how I, if I give the slightest pause after a sentence, even if it is pretty clear that it led up to the next sentence, some nevrotypical person starts talking. Not because I’m done, but because the sentence ended
fridam@lemmy.blahaj.zone This. There’s some sort of flow and cadence they lock on to, and seem to know when to give way and when to take over. There might even be body language they’re reading to know when to jump in and when to yield. I’ve watched it happen at work for years now, where my pod of coworkers will be discussing an issue, and they all just speak seamlessly, one person’s sentence sending and the next person’s beginning like they had coordinated. Meanwhile, I’ll be sitting there waiting for everyone to stop and give a clear signal that there is room to add my own thoughts, and the space never comes.
Usually my manager puts the breaks on the discussion to say “Kichae, it looks like you have something you want to add”. Or, I just stop waiting for an opportunity and start talking over people, and I’m the largest and loudest guy in the room, so they stop.
That’s the part that gets me. I have to rehearse the sentence I’m about to say or I’ll often get stuck on a word or phrasing. Or I’ll just botch the actual enunciation of the sentence…
I concur, this is a problem specific to people who interrupt or talk over others, not the person being interrupted. A good way to test it is to just go out and talk to more people: it doesn’t happen outside of certain social circles.
LadyButterfly is a very prominent poster. Which is a good thing. It makes lemmy feel less empty but it also has the consequence of lower quality posts.
Oh yea, most of their posts are great, and my response was left without context. The ones here just always seem a bit off target, and commentors seem to agree.
That’s not necessarily an autism thing, a lot of people just don’t know when to shut the fuck up and let someone add to the conversation.
I have a coworker who does this. I accepted a long time ago that we aren’t having conversations, she’s just speaking AT me.
Yeah some people like to talk, even it’s a repeat of the last talk, sometimes you just gotta feign a phone call or a message and move on
But how do normal people just keep talking in a conversation that has no gaps? I’ve seen it happen, the conversation stays on a topic but there are literally no gaps where you can start talking. It’s like they know when it’s their turn so they can immediately start talking when the other person finished their sentence. And they know what the other persons last word is.
They don’t really always do that. I think there is also a thing where the one talking let the other one take the word if they start talking. As an adhd gal i often experience how I, if I give the slightest pause after a sentence, even if it is pretty clear that it led up to the next sentence, some nevrotypical person starts talking. Not because I’m done, but because the sentence ended
fridam@lemmy.blahaj.zone This. There’s some sort of flow and cadence they lock on to, and seem to know when to give way and when to take over. There might even be body language they’re reading to know when to jump in and when to yield. I’ve watched it happen at work for years now, where my pod of coworkers will be discussing an issue, and they all just speak seamlessly, one person’s sentence sending and the next person’s beginning like they had coordinated. Meanwhile, I’ll be sitting there waiting for everyone to stop and give a clear signal that there is room to add my own thoughts, and the space never comes.
Usually my manager puts the breaks on the discussion to say “Kichae, it looks like you have something you want to add”. Or, I just stop waiting for an opportunity and start talking over people, and I’m the largest and loudest guy in the room, so they stop.
And also, they know WHAT to say and look present and connected at the same time. Incredible stuff, like watching somebody juggle buzzsaws.
That’s the part that gets me. I have to rehearse the sentence I’m about to say or I’ll often get stuck on a word or phrasing. Or I’ll just botch the actual enunciation of the sentence…
This, 100%. If you’re unsure, pay attention to the subject matter. If they hop topics 5 times before taking a breath, it ain’t you.
At which point, do you really want to contribute anything?
Just walk away and start communicating with the trees or something.
I concur, this is a problem specific to people who interrupt or talk over others, not the person being interrupted. A good way to test it is to just go out and talk to more people: it doesn’t happen outside of certain social circles.
Said this on half the memes here. Oh, all of them are by the same OP, go figure.
LadyButterfly is a very prominent poster. Which is a good thing. It makes lemmy feel less empty but it also has the consequence of lower quality posts.
Oh yea, most of their posts are great, and my response was left without context. The ones here just always seem a bit off target, and commentors seem to agree.