My wad of soggy bacon is telling my mouth to gape wide open and make stupid sounds after reading this
My wad of soggy bacon is very happy
The other night, I saw a weird spider on the bathroom mat while I was doing my business. The bathroom was lit only by a night light, so I could barely make it out. It was larger than our usual resident spiders, and writhing around like I had stepped on it and hurt it. I finished, stood up, and turned the light on to see the spider better. It wasn’t there. Apparently, spider hallucinations are common.
Several years ago now, I was talking to my girlfriend at the time about an argument we’d had about a week earlier. She listened for a minute and then said, “We never argued about that, where were we?” I told her we were in my car in my garage. She’d not been to my house up to that point. I realized I had dreamt it, but I completely and fully believed it was a real memory, but it simply could not have been. I freaked out for a few days when I read that people often confuse dreams for real memories. I now question which other of my memories are just past dreams. Why would trust any of my memories now, when any number of them might just be old dreams?
One of my most vivid memories of waking up at night, I looked down towards my feet and there was a dark, spider-shaped shadow about the size of a dachshund. I looked at it for a second, then there was a flurry of movement from its legs as it rushed up towards my face. I jumped out of bed and threw the covers at it, then hit the lights. Nothing was there.
My brother and I shared a room. He often had epileptic seizures. I suddenly woke up as he was having one, but I couldn’t move a muscle.
I’ve read about sleep paralysis before, but it still wasn’t fun. It lasted maybe 40 seconds.
That’s just a common imp, best to ignore them
Have you ever had a dream you were a butterfly? Perhaps this is the dream…
Or maybe it’s a butterfly’s dream of being TrackinDaKraken.
This post made me hungry
EDIT: This is not proof that I’m a zombie
EDIT 2: To clarify, I am a zombie, but it’s my lack of a pulse and my green skin that prove that
That’s because the apparatus described above uses roughly 20% of total caloric intake despite only making up about 2% of body weight.
This also changes through the lifespan. For infants it’s more like 60% of caloric intake
This also changes through the lifespan. For infants it’s more like 60% of caloric intake
And for 79-year-olds it’s apparently more like 0% of caloric intake.
