C. Rubber pants.

You?

So your lateness is a problem they are supposed to solve for you?

Strike up a conversation and find out how their day is going. Maybe you’ll get the answers you seek.

Major “Main Character Syndrome” vibes. Other people have their own lives and their own reasons, ya know?

Science is the original FAFO

Man, I hope not.

I think "claims"would have been a better verb for this headline. Nobody’s buying it.