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Cake day: July 1st, 2023

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  • I still have Craftsman tools I bought in the '80s, and some I inherited from my Dad. My only complaint is whatever they made some of the old screwdriver handles out of has degraded ever-so-slightly and off-gassed something that makes my toolbox smell like somebody puked in it. No idea what’s up with that…


  • Craftsman and Kenmore always had pretty decent quality. We bought a lot of our bigger household purchases from Sears back in the day. I do kinda miss 'em, just not the constant harassment from the salespeople to buy an extended warranty or open a Sears charge account. Some of 'em would get a little pushy about those damned warranties…



  • I had an '82 Ford Escort. Those things were notorious for lunching the motor if the timing belt ever broke (which they did every 45,000 miles like clockwork) while you were traveling down the road. The valves would stop in whatever position they were in at that instant, and then the momentum of the car would keep the pistons moving up and down, bashing the piston tops in to whichever valves were unlucky enough to still be open, ruining pretty-much everything. At the same time I owned that car, my best friend owned an '82 Chevy Cavalier. We were constantly one-upping each other over who owned the biggest turd…


  • Back in about '89-'90 I was the assistant manager at a fast oil change place, and we had a regular customer with a maroon '76 Aspen with a bullet-proof slant-six who got his oil changed with us regularly. I could hear him coming. I’d know it was him without even looking because of the distinctive TAP-TAP-TAP -TAP-TAP-TAP-TAP. We’d pull him in and he’d tell us to just change the oil and filter and don’t bother checking all that other stuff, so that’s what we’d do. We’d pull the plug and if more than a half a quart drained out we’d be surprised. After a filter swap, we’d fill it back up and restart it and it would go TAP-TAP-TAP-TAP-tap-tap-tap-ta-ta-ta-t-t-t-t-t-t-t- etc and he’d smile and pay and be on his way. Of course, we’d see him again in about 3 or 4 months, same thing, rinse and repeat. The tapping was his signal to get it changed. Fast forward to '97, after working as a manager at other locations I came back to that same station as the manager there and I’ll be damned if that same guy in that same '76 Aspen didn’t pull in for the same service with that same oil-leaking loud-ass tapping slant-six, still hanging in there…


  • geez… this is something my brain just does. They’re like earworms where my brain gets stuck in a loop or something. Drives me bonkers sometimes. And it’s not just swapping initial sounds. It could be swapping internal vowel sounds or ending syllables. It’s how Bradley Cooper has forever became Boodley Crapper in my fucked-up noggin…








  • I drove a taxi and dispatched for a couple of years back in the mid '80s. For ease of use, Street Guides were a drivers best friend, because they just gave you concise directions from the closest main road. For instance, if I wanted Elm street, I would find it quickly alphabetically, and it would tell me something like “Runs south from Main St, two blocks east of First Ave.” The driver would mainly just need a decent understanding of the main roads and how the numbering system for addresses worked, and they could just flip through it pretty quick without having to spread out a big map. The whole city fit into a neat little paperback book.


  • tipicaldik@lemmy.worldtoMildly Infuriating@lemmy.world*Permanently Deleted*
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    9 months ago

    I had a good friend who worked LP for wal-mart back in the '90’s. He loved that shit. He’d burn CD copies of the surveillance videos of his latest escapades fighting with and tackling shoplifters and bring them home for us to see. He was a master of “redirecting” someone running away from him into whatever nearby solid object he had available. I know those big red bollards that keep cars from driving thru the front doors claimed more than a couple of victims at his, um… urging. Entertaining stuff for sure.



  • I knew some folks that used to own a “dented can” grocery store named Dirt Cheap Grocery. They would find all sorts of deals on entire lots of nearly expired canned and frozen goods and what ever various other things they could find through their various connections. There would always be something different, and they would have some pretty incredible deals sometimes. I remember buying an entire case of frozen hash brown patties for $5. There were six 5 lb bags in there. we split it up with my wife’s sisters families. Another time they had those Michelina’s frozen pasta dishes that had just expired for 10 for $1. My favorite deodorant scent had been recently discontinued and they just so happened to get a hold of a big display bin full of hundreds of them and sold them for $1 a piece. It took me several years before I finally ran out…


  • We came home one evening and discovered our 10lb wiener-pinscher had eaten a whole dish of Dove dark Chocolates while we were away. Easily a couple of dozen pieces… All that was left were little bits of foil wrappers all over the floor where he attempted to peel each one open. I’da really liked to have seen how he was doing that. We just knew he was fixin’ to die. Aside from looking guilty as hell, he showed zero signs of any ill effects. There’s no telling how much of the foil wrappers he ate either…