What I mean is people on the spectrum may face the treatment or discrimination equivalent to “Don’t excuse me for your autism!” when he or she’s having a meltdown dismissing it as “bad behavior” when it’s not. It becomes difficult from childhood if schools aren’t catered on accommodating this demographic, they’re considered normal physically but their outlook on life is different from their neurotypical counterparts.
Classroom teachers may not be trained to deal with such even if they’re told in advance, leading to mistaking meltdowns or being upset as “bad behavior” since it’s an additional challenge as opposed to teaching kids who are not Autistic. Some parents also tell their Autistic kid to “control your emotions” or “wipe those tears away” to avoid public humiliation (if kid causes a scene) including possible neurotypical onlookers & gossipers.
When kids have a tantrum at public settings (like malls or parks) or confined spaces (like inside a plane), this becomes taxing for parents on raising the kid while enduring awkward moments from onlookers who gossip “tell your child to shut up”. Having parents who understand is better than being ignorant even when informed, as parents who understand are likely to defend when their neurodivergent kid is being discriminated against.
There’s more info about Autistic kids than grown ups (what they fail to realize is that Autistic kids become adults over time, basically having to co-exist with it for the rest of their lives). Wearing a mask is temporary but not the permanent solution to the root cause of societal misunderstanding. Does it stem from the fact that physical ailments (crouches or wheelchairs) are visible in front of their eyes than neurodivergent people?
As in, they would not push someone on a wheelchair since that’s their method of mobility but feel fine on discriminating someone who is neurodivergent. They are not comparable in that sense, since a wheelchair bound person has a physical ailment while someone on the spectrum is able bodied. It could be that there are legal consequences for mistreating someone with a physical ailment versus a neurodivergent person.
It’s because we experience the world and interact with people in some fundamentally different ways. The frame of reference doesn’t exist for them to understand and that makes it even more challenging.
I will never understand what it is to ‘read the room’, as an experience, but I get the idea of what it means. This common skill, is considered very important to social interaction and rude if not observed… but to me it’s like a telepathic ability everyone else has and I don’t. I think that double-deficiency in perception and the expected behavior isn’t easily understood or even clearly observable by others. To them, I am behaving ignorantly.
Think about all the trouble regular people have in understanding two different perspectives on practically anything. It is a skill, and one that I think some autistic people are compelled to develop to have any chance of getting along… its just not so for everyone else.