• Shellofbiomatter@lemmus.org
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    11 hours ago

    Idk, never really had that strong of a drive for socialization of friend making. Got the recluse variation of asd.

    Whatever daily chitchat happens at regular places, like work, gym, home, is more than enough to overfill any interaction need coupled with whatever discussions/arguments happen here and that’s it, whatever low need there is s completely satisfied.

    I’m fairly sure my vocal cords have even atrophied over the years. Just few weeks ago for a short while i had to teach a new person at work and i lost my voice and throat was sore for few days afterwards.

    Though i assume there’s some deeper family trait in it as well. From fathers side of my family, great grandfather spoke handful of words per week. Grandfather just mumbled or grunted. Father was the chattiest one, few sentences per day, same with uncle, same with my brother.

    Don’t know about mothers side family.

    • mikezeman@lemmy.zip
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      10 hours ago

      A bit tangential, but just want to respond to your as someone who teaches singing and has to do a lot of talking in my profession - teaching (generally) involves a lot more talking than people tend to realize, and suddenly doing that after a long period will tire out anyone’s vocal cords! I know my voice is typically shot the first week of teaching after summer break if I’m not very mindful about how I use my voice. This isn’t like muscular atrophy though, the voice bounces back quick and adjusts to the increased use as long as you stay hydrated and don’t push it too far past the fatigue and risk injury.

      • Shellofbiomatter@lemmus.org
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        10 hours ago

        Honestly thats rather good to know, thank you.
        Yeah it did recover over the weekend, but as the student went under other person i returned to my regular barely talking state.

    • paultimate14@lemmy.world
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      16 hours ago

      Same. I believe I’ve suffered from autistic burnout for roughly the last year. I was pushing myself to be social, for my wife and other reasons. That led to me finally getting diagnosed.

      Almost all of the autism resources I have found say something along the lines of “Autistic people actually love to be social with other people! It’s just difficult because kfnthr double-empathy problem. Try making friends with autistic people”. The psychologist, therapist, books, articles, everything. It all felt… Weird.

      Then I talked to my older sister who was diagnosed almost a decade ago. She realized a while ago that socialization is just bad for her, so she stopped doing it and has been much happier and healthier ever since.

      • Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world
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        12 hours ago

        If you meet one autistic person, you’ve met one autistic person. We’re each a unique bundle of overlapping quirks, but no two of us are the same.

        I imagine that instruction (to make friends with autistic people) is made in good faith, but you’re right - some of us are just happier alone.

        Honestly, I think that if we weren’t living in a world falling to shit, if I didn’t feel like I’m just scraping by, if I didn’t have to work full time to survive, I’d probably feel more energy for socialization. But with things as they are, I’m exhausted, and any further socialization is another drain on my already-depleted energy stores. I’m just not built for this world the way it is.

      • Shellofbiomatter@lemmus.org
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        17 hours ago

        Different communication style and preferences are kinda one of the core characteristics of autism, of course there’s degrees of variation to it, but going to extreme end of reclusiveness does fall under it.
        Though usually it’s made worse by communication difficulties, social anxiety, difficulties in reading body language or facial expressions and just hyper focusing on their own special interest.