All you’ve managed to do is prove that you are the issue here. They’re probably making the wrong order because you’re a POS. Tens or hundreds of millions of people order black coffee every day without any issues, most who’ll never get a wrong order in their life. If you keep getting the wrong thing then there is surely something wrong from your side.

I’ve ordered black coffee from many places for many years and not once gotten a wrong order. Never been a batista, don’t see how that would matter anyway.