I’ve been trying to get involved in activism in order to stop MAGA from taking the US midterms by force (see Louisiana v. Callais ruling by SCOTUS and then all the southern states redistricting mid-election).

Election-focused activism is canvassing, and interrupting people’s lives by cold-calling people would be soul-crushing work. I could write postcards but my left-handed handwriting scrawl is awful.

Visibility activism is going out into loud crowds. I’m scared of large crowds generally. Large screaming / chanting crowds are overwhelming.

Noncooperation activism involves civil disobedience and the willingness to confront law enforcement (or ICE / CBP) and risk brutality from the same. Also they want young people on the front line, and I’m way old.

All of them would really rather I just give them a lot of money, and I’m low income.

Then there’s the infighting in the Democratic party, since the DNC and DCCC only support center-right establishment candidates, and progressive socialist candidates are the ones that actually inspire the youth to get out and vote, but good luck getting them support by the mainstream party.

And then there’s that daunting feeling that there’s nothing for SCOTUS which suffers no consequences when the conservative Federalist-Society supermajority drops rulings that strip away civil rights or kill public protections or destroy democratic features. Reform takes a long time and requires the left to take power first (and then – since we’re talking establishment Democrats – being willing to pass SCOTUS reforms)

The organizers who’ve hosted meetings so far insist we’ll campaign harder, but we have to win by unquestionable margins or expect challenges to the election results. And the Democrats campaigned harder in the 2024 general and lost to the trillion-dollar far-right propaganda machine that churns out fear and rage and prejudice.

So I’m having a hard time not despairing, and other than writing crabby letters to my representatives (which feels like shouting into the void), I can’t seem to find a role to play in the resistance.

So I’m feeling discouraged AF.