• vzq@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    11 months ago

    I used to live by that rule, but it turns not everyone likes to be treated the way I like to be treated. So now I just ask how they want to be treated.

    Just a trick I picked up from the BDSM subs ;)

    • thestereobus@lemmy.ml
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      11 months ago

      Exactly. I had to learn this too. I am unusual in a number of ways. When I treat people how I want to be treated I am often mistreating them and damaging the relationship. People are different and need different things. You have to communicate rather than unilaterally apply your self-empathy.

    • 0ops@lemm.ee
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      11 months ago

      Yeah, there’s a lot of things IDGAF about myself (like my birthdays, etc.) that make it easy to forget that for other people it means a lot. So even if I’m a cool acquaintance I’ll be a shitty friend :(. I’m working on that