Does anyone have any experiences, frustrations or advice that they would like to share about maintaining long term relationships or starting over as someone with autism?
I‘m a millennial woman, and keeping people in my life has been a lifelong struggle. Today my spouse wants a divorce after 16 years of marriage. The reason stated is because of autism. I’m introverted, like to plan things, tend to lose focus and it’s like people just eventually get bored of you.
I have no family support, grew up in the foster system. I would lose my health insurance, home and everything in a divorce. Friends are through my spouse.
Feel free to PM me too if you are interested in talking. Could use a friend or maybe advice trying to start my life over somewhere else that I can get healthcare. I also happen to be learning German but open to talking with anyone.
That is a very unkind thing for somebody to say to you and it’s not okay. You deserve somebody who will appreciate you for who you are and not resent you for who you’re not. Somebody who will see your effort and thank you for trying, lean on your strengths and make up for your weaknesses. Somebody who will treat you with kindness all the time, not just during the good times. Your struggles are valid and not a weapon to be wielded against you.
I also had an ex who said she was leaving because of my autism. It really hurt to hear, and I don’t think I’ll ever forget that pain. So I just want you to hear that you’re great the way you are. I’m sorry that somebody you care about said that to you, and I know how much that hurts even if you know deep down that they’re wrong. And they are wrong. The truth is they held themselves back, but want to blame it all on you. They agreed to care for you as a whole, not just part of you. They don’t get to blame you for changing their mind.