That’s actually also fine, because that’s very easy to feel out when talking to someone, IME. I was more trying to filter out the type of person who doesn’t know anything about BDSM but would enthusiastically agree to take control without doing any work to understand how to do things safely. I’m tired of being endangered because someone didn’t want to listen to me explaining that you need to avoid the kidneys in impact play or that you can’t put the entire body weight on an unsupported suspended strappado. I’m not good at sorting that type of person out in my dating life, unfortunately, but I can spot them immediately when they dm/talk about dming.
Ooh, yes. When I was in high school and college, I wouldn’t date anyone who drove recklessly. A combination of survivorship and selection bias made that no longer an issue when I got a little older, thankfully.
That’s actually also fine, because that’s very easy to feel out when talking to someone, IME. I was more trying to filter out the type of person who doesn’t know anything about BDSM but would enthusiastically agree to take control without doing any work to understand how to do things safely. I’m tired of being endangered because someone didn’t want to listen to me explaining that you need to avoid the kidneys in impact play or that you can’t put the entire body weight on an unsupported suspended strappado. I’m not good at sorting that type of person out in my dating life, unfortunately, but I can spot them immediately when they dm/talk about dming.
Ah! ok, that makes sense.
A similar thing probably also applies to other areas of life - like how does this person drive?
Ooh, yes. When I was in high school and college, I wouldn’t date anyone who drove recklessly. A combination of survivorship and selection bias made that no longer an issue when I got a little older, thankfully.