transcription: the lioness ignores that she dosent have any true passion that drives her and has zero idea what shes going to do with her life :3
transcription: the lioness ignores that she dosent have any true passion that drives her and has zero idea what shes going to do with her life :3
the passion that drives me is the desire to not be homeless or hungry, and that has basically informed what I did with my life - I got the basic education needed to get a good paying job without going into debt …
i kinda did the opposite, i dropped out of highschool and started hitchhiking around to get away from all the capitalism
i didn’t realize you could escape 😝
but more seriously, I do know some people that live Nomadland style, basically working for a season at an Amazon warehouse or in fast food, saving up money, and then living unemployed for as long as their savings will take them.
The homelessness is a given, both to reduce costs and to keep mobile and able to go where the jobs are.
That’s a life without medical insurance, a roof over your head, etc. - a kind of asceticism that appealed to my self-loathing, but ultimately I feel sensitive and incapable, unable to rely on myself or survive. I have too much anxiety and neuroticism, and I worry about when I’m old or if I’m sick or disabled. Life feels too fragile, and I felt like that path leads to inevitable suffering and untimely death for me. (Not that capitulating and trying to integrate into middle class life doesn’t also entail suffering, or even untimely death, but it’s at least more comfortable and you have more resources to catch, prevent, and address medical issues that come up.)