E-bikes still have a massive carbon footprint compared to regular bicycles,

The comparison is not between regular bikes and e bikes but between e bikes and cars. E bikes win this.

Either way, a car, even if its an EV, will be the better pick for every situation I stated above.

A 3000€ gaming machine will be better in any task than a 500€ office pc. But as long as the office pc is sufficient, why spend the extra money?