“Are good to make tea out of” isn’t a grammatically correct demand unless you are tiny, green, and live in a cave down by the Dagobah system.

“MAKE A DECENT CUPPA” is a demand.

Buying heron on the internet and I don’t even need crypto.

There was a period a few years ago, when my kid was like, 3…we were driving somewhere and I asked him if he knew where he was.

His response? “You’re in the jungle, baby”.

Nah it’s just our larva, pupa, and adult stages.

Of course. He’s the baby!

What finally killed TV show quotable taglines? Was it Bazinga? I hope it was Bazinga.

Looks more like New Balanceiaga to me.

Oh man I’ve got hammer toes on one foot and you’ve made me realize that one of them has gotten really bad since the last time I had to wear anything more than sneakers.

I’m actually dreading the next time I have to wear dress shoes now. And I’m a 14WW, it’s hard enough finding shoes without toe conditions adding on top. I think I just need to find a cobbler, at this point.

They made “hoping to own something” their whole personality.

The American Dream.

I’m leaning satire. If you poke around his site enough, you’ll get rickrolled.

There also seems to be no such thing as “The American Foundation for Heritage-Based Circumcision”.

Nah that’s why it’s called “The American Dream”. The point is, we’re supposed to be fantasizing about a better life in the future if we just endure a little hardship now.

That sounds shockingly similar to the tactics used by religion. And pedophiles in vans. It’s weird how they are all the same thing. They all over-promise, under-deliver, and fuck you in the ass along the way.

Others don’t trust their water even if it technically meets EPA standards.

Less “don’t trust the water”, more “don’t trust the EPA”. And under this administration, who can blame them.

It’s a shame that our options are “Lead and PFAS” or “Microplastics and probably PFAS” (not to mention the plastic waste itself and the wild inefficiencies of transporting water by fucking truck of all things)

I read this as Danny Devito, because dumplings are the lorax of the soup.

Geoffrey Rush quote.

Jeffrey Lebowski stare.

Resale value.

Resale value.

So, Hi, I stumbled here from all, and now I think I might be autistic.

Like, feeling stressed out and overwhelmed because of a break in routine or not being able to do things my way (because any other way is inferior and this is why…I took the time to find the best way to do it, through repetition and trial and error. Like loading groceries on the conveyor belt at the supermarket…frozen stuff goes on first, then cold stuff, then shelf-stables, then medicine, chemicals, and breads…exceptions for large heavy things like cases of water or soda…those stay in the cart and become the foundation for the packed bags, obviously. That way frozen stuff gets bagged first, and usually has polygonal packaging so it makes a good base at the bottom of the bag. Then the refrigerated stuff is kept cool from the frozen stuff on the bottom of the bag, and now when I go to unload everything, all the stuff that goes in the fridge is in the same bags. Naturally all the stuff that goes in the pantry, medicine cabinet, and under the sink/laundryroom are all together, too. Though sometimes I just don’t bag and put all the stuff right back into my cart and load it up into a tote or a hamper in my trunk. Bagging groceries is ultimately a waste of time when you’re just gonna unbag them in 10 minutes anyway)

Now you suck a mighty fine pecker, toots
But give the devil his due
I bet a dildo of gold against your soul, I suck dicks better than you.

I can smell the dunkin’ coming off his accent.

Gotta work at a compounding pharmacy.

Thank you for this. I was losing it after an hour of trying to get my youngest out of bed…it was 2 minutes until the bus when I saw this post and remembered I didn’t give him his Adderall and he only had on one sock on.

Just the reminder I needed to put down my phone.